Thursday, January 26, 2012

Mommy Mattress

So a lot of people co-sleep. That is, their children sleep in bed with them. Seth co-slept with me for a very long time. When he was first born, I was breast feeding and had an extra bed in his room. We often fell asleep together in that bed during middle of the night feeding sessions. Then, later on, I was a single mother, and we shared a room. He had his own bed, but he preferred to sleep with me, so I happily obliged. When he was close to 3, we moved in with Joe and he had to start sleeping on his own. He still crawled in bed with us often. I won't lie...he still gets in bed with me a lot. If he is scared, if he doesn't feel well, or even just to cuddle, he will crawl in our bed. Joe recently worked the night shift for a very long time, 8 or 9 months I think. Seth slept with me for most of those nights.

Stella, on the other hand, likes her independence when she actually chooses to sleep. She views our bed as a play area and never asks to come to bed with us. Boy do I wish she would because she is not the best sleeper. Quite opposite of her big brother, actually. She sleeps through the night now...sometimes. Even though she is in a toddler bed, she still screams for me to come get her when she wakes, which happens throughout the night and most often before 6 am in the mornings. She does get out of her bed, but she bangs on her bedroom door like a prisoner. BANG BANG BANG!!! "MOMMY!!! COME GET ME MOMMY!!! MOMMY!!! I SCARED!!!!" She also cries hysterically like the world is totally ending. With tears and everything. It's not like she's locked in. At least not every time. Just kidding! I don't lock her in. I guess she hasn't realized that not only could she play with the abundance of toys in her room upon waking, but she could also turn the door knob and play with the over abundance of toys in the play room outside her bedroom! Oh well. On the weekend mornings she wakes at 5 freaking am in the morning, I would love nothing more than to bring her to my bed, where she would then sleep another two hours. This does not ever work. She just starts pinching my face and saying, "Get up! Mommy! Get up!!!" Le sigh.

Recently, she had the flu. She was definitely not feeling well at all because she would frequently fall asleep on my shoulder. She rarely falls asleep randomly anymore. She kept waking up at night and I kept trying to bring her to bed with me, thinking that since she was sick, she would go ahead and sleep. No such luck. She refuses to let me put her down and must be in my arms. She's like some sort super glue. I mean, really, you can try to pry her off of you, but her arms and legs wrap around you and she doesn't budge. Sometimes I just let go to see what will happen and she is still stuck there. I can literally walk around my house not holding on and she will not fall off of me. Sometimes I envision going out in public this way. Oh, hi! Oh this? This is just my extra appendage. Don't worry, it doesn't bite. 

I'm not sure why I torture myself so much. A few nights ago, she woke due to a coughing fit and Joe brought her to me in bed. I was so dead tired that I held onto her. She refuses to lay next to me in bed. She laid right on top of me. I was on my back. She was on her tummy, head on my chest. She did fall asleep, although it was a restless sleep. In which she continued to roll over and over, from tummy to back, never leaving my body. I was kicked and punched in many different unpleasant areas. She continued to huff and puff as if she just was not satisfied with her sleeping arrangement. I tried a few times to put her next to me and failed. Super glue I tell you! I laid there and wondered if she realized she was trying to get comfortable on top of a person. I mean, really? And then I realized, while staring at the ceiling in desperate need of sleep, that if this is how it would be if we co-slept with her, then I am glad we don't.

So, I got up and put her back to bed. And then she woke up an hour later and began banging on her door. And it started all over again. I suppose to her I am just another mattress. Ha.

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